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Jeffery Jones
'''Jeffery Levi Jones '''is a morbidly obese, mentally ill man who lives on Big Macs and other unhealthy food items. Though he should have been dead twenty years ago due to medical issues, Jeffery is still alive and kicking it to this day, munching on Big Macs and having his occasional breakfast called "The Super Special Breakfast." Jeffery Jones grew up with both his parents Pete Jones and Sherley Jones until he turned five years old, when they got divorced. Pete took custody over Jeffery while Sherley took custody over Karl, who is Jeffery's younger brother. While living with Pete, Jeffery has been abused during his lifetime by him due to his alcoholism. He was mostly neglected by Pete and the father would never show up to his little league baseball games in elementary school because he would be too drunk to show up. When high school began for Jeffery, kids were making fun of his stench and his weight. Jeffery bathed only once a week and weighed 220 pounds by this time. Jeffery finally graduated high school. Life in the 70's and the Jeffery Jones syndrome In 1978, Jeffery started working at Pizza Hut. The job lasted until 1983. During the 70's, Jeffery listened to a lot of Rare Earth and had a few albums of theirs. In 1989, something unusual was happening to Jeffery's brain. He began to be delusional, barely conscious with himself and just generally out of tune with the world. This was known as the "Jeffery Jones Syndrome" which progressed from then up until now. This was the beginning of Jeffery's madness. From then up until now, he masturbates to himself, young children and the theme song to Regular Show. He also does an activity called "gerting" where he pukes in a bucket and eats it. This is a repeated process until he decides he's finished. Jeffery has been banned from various stores and restaurants due to defecating in public. 2011-present: Facebook, arrest, and post arrest Jeffery joined Facebook in 2011 and befriended Michael Mahoney and Jon Borderlon. He originally called himself "Eville Jeff" for some reason. Since most Wurld phenomena started around this time, Jeffery is sometimes speculated to have accidentally opened the first Portal and to have partial responsibility for the Wurld's inception. Top scientists believe that the Jeffery Jones Syndrome residing within his body works similarly to Pyonium. He would often try to solicit Michael, Jon, and the others for some thinly-veiled sex, but as they have IQs over 50 and are deities, they never fell for this. They sometimes talked with Jeffery over Facebook, but it was hard to hold a conversation with him due to his lack of awareness. Jeffery used an old PC with a CRT monitor, and dial-up internet, which he loves. When his internet is dialing up, he claps and repeatedly says, "YUP!". He originally used Windows '98 before finally upgrading to 2000. Despite his lack of awareness, he showed some care for his cousin Barrack, who was hospitalized after a heart attack because his health was somehow even worse than Jeffery's. After a suggestion from Michael, Jeffery attempted to create and sell World of Warcraft accounts to fund Barrack's medical bill, but when this didn't work out, he ran for President. He got one vote. Barrack died in the hospital during a let's play of MEDABOTS AX. The LP only lasted one part, and the Sad Violin Music played in memoriam. Jeffery had some interest in gaming, even going to the launch party for the Nintendo 64. Against all odds, Jeffery actually created a gaming console called the Jone5. When turned on through the use of a lawnmower cord, it sounded like a combination of an old engine and a toaster. It only had a small library of games, such as Big Mac World. The console somehow had online capabilities, but only a handful were made and the system was known to overheat often and parts would fly off of it, making it highly dangerous. Jeffery has faked his death at least once and legitimately thought he was a ghost using Facebook. To be fair, he did actually have a pretty bad heart attack at the time and was dead for a few minutes. Considering what he's been through already and given his horrible health condition, he's pretty much invincible at this point. Category:Heroes